KIND WORDS
"Yossi's Heart"
From: Do Unto Others: How Good Deeds Can Change Your Life
Printed with Permission of the author, Abraham J. Twerski, M.D.,
Founder of the Gateway Rehabilitation System
Yossi was born with a defective heart. His parents were advised that he would need an operation when he turned seven and that the operation was best done in America.
Yossi's parents, both Israelis, knew no one in America, so when the time came a mutual friend put them in touch with me and I found a medical center in Pittsburgh, where I live, where the surgery could be performed. Several months later Yossi and his parents arrived.
Neither Yossi nor his parents understood a single word of English so I put out the word in the Pittsburgh community for anyone who spoke Hebrew to contact me. Twenty-nine people volunteered and I contacted all of them for an emergency meeting.
At this meeting I explained the predicament. Yossi would be hospitalized for at least two weeks and it was absolutely essential that an interpreter be available at all times. There was no way he could make himself understood to the staff. I asked people to volunteer several hours of their time to be in attendance and we arranged a schedule that covered twenty-four hours a day for two weeks. Each person had an assigned time, and we agreed that one person would not leave until the next arrived.
The plan operated like clockwork. Yossi and his parents were never left alone and not only was there effective interpretation, but the family also received the support of interested people. The postoperative period was not without many anxious moments and Yossi's parents swear that without the moral support of so many friends, they could never have survived it.
The entire hospital staff was impressed by this community cooperation and devotion and when Yossi was discharged the surgeon waived his bill! The family had no insurance coverage and the hospital wrote off whatever they could and gave them the lowest rate. This was paid through donations made by friends of the small community that had sprung up around Yossi.
Before Yossi left for home a gala party was held, attended by the volunteers, contributors, surgeon and other members of the hospital staff. Tearful good-byes were said, there was much embracing, lots of people gave of themselves and got back this:
they had helped save a little boy. Along the way each one discovered qualities inside that might never have been tapped if not for Yossi. On top of this many friendships had been formed during this period and these people who had not known each other became close friends, having worked for a common cause.
Six years later on a visit to Israel I made a surprise visit to Yossi, but he wasn't home: he was playing basketball! I went to the playground and could not stop my tears of joy when I saw the robust little boy who had once been so hampered by illness playing a game of hoops. On my return to Pittsburgh I contacted the participants in Yossi's operation for a reunion and we all bonded again as we shared the news. One man originally had been reluctant to help because he was terrified of hospitals. Now he relayed that he no longer hesitated to visit friends when they were ill; he had gotten over a phobia that had controlled him.
It's twenty years later. Yossi is happily
married and has a child. He sends cards twice a year which we circulate. In this way the group stays in touch and when a member needs help or wants to share happiness we are there.
What we did for Yossi pales in comparison to what Yossi did for us. Each of us is stronger as a result of this event. That is the power of goodness.
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"The Thrill of Victory"
From Kindness: Making a Difference in People's Lives: Formulas, stories, and insights
By Zelig Pliskin
Printed with Permission of Shaar Press
There are many levels of joy, ecstasy, and euphoria when it comes to the thrill of victory. Depending on the type of victory and how much it means to the individual who experiences it, to that degree will the joy be intensified. Most major victories happen rarely, often once in a lifetime. Worldwide these take the form of inter-city and international sports events. The joy of an upset victory in a World Cup, World Series, or Superbowl for players and fans is very intense. But with these events, the vast majority of people around the world either don’t care or were rooting for a team that didn’t make it.
Wouldn’t it be absolutely wonderful if you could have the thrill of a victory every single day? You can. How? By celebrating the victory of doing a major act of kindness that is difficult. The greater the difficulty, the greater the potential for the joy of victory.
Think of some people for whom you could do something beneficial, but you find this difficult to do. You
might feel resentful towards them for one reason or another. You might feel envious. You might feel that they don’t do anything or enough for you. Whatever the reason, you find it difficult to do things for them.
Now visualize yourself doing a kind act for one of those people. See yourself going out of your way to help them in ways that make a significant difference in their lives. As you see yourself doing this, imagine a huge stadium full of people cheering for your victory. See and hear and feel the exuberant excitement and enthusiasm of one hundred thousand ecstatic fans. Or you can imagine a million people cheering for you in a parade down New York’s Fifth Avenue. Mentally repeat this over and over again. As you do, you will feel a great sense of victory as you contemplate how you will help the people you find difficult to help.
A variation of this is to imagine yourself doing something that would constitute a glorious and intense triumph. This can be in any area
that you personally would feel euphoric excitement for such a splendid victory. Visualize this vividly until you actually feel the joy of that success. Studies have shown that our hormonal system has actual biochemical responses even though the victory is totally a figment of our imagination. Then see yourself doing a difficult act of kindness. The act might seem relatively small. But if it’s difficult for you, it’s a victory and worthy of celebration.
When you act externally with enthusiasm and excitement, your inner emotional state reacts like a mirror to your external patterns. So when you do acts of kindness that are difficult, act externally with the joy of a great victory. As you keep this up, the difficult will not only be easier, they will be a source of great joy in your life.
Right now think of three acts of kindness that would constitute a victory for you when you do them. Write down a commitment to do them. As you feel the thrill of victory, you will be
motivated to continue doing more of these kind acts.
The author heard this story from a student:
I was living a rather boring existence. I shared my feelings with someone who was much more excited about life than I was. We compared notes and I saw that the general condition of our lives wasn’t that different.
"What about your life gives you so much excitement?" I asked him.
"I have the excitement of victories every single day," he told me.
"How do you manage that?" I asked.
"Each day I think of an act of kindness that would be difficult for me to do and I follow through," he replied. "This creates daily excitement for me. If more people realized how great their lives would be if they practiced this, we would live in a happier world. These are non-competitive victories where everyone involved is a winner."
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