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KIND WORDS
Do More Than Asked "Remembering the People We Take for Granted"
The author wishes to remain anonymous
Edited by Shmuel Greenbaum
Printed with Permission of
http://www.PartnersInKindness.org The author wishes to remain anonymous
Edited by Shmuel Greenbaum
Printed with Permission of
These e-mails have got me thinking - so many of them are about kindnesses we have done to (or had done for us by) complete strangers. Many of us are fortunate enough to have family and friends we are in contact with every day, and these are often the people we take for granted and expect more from.
Therefore, this last week I've been looking around for things I can do for my husband, children and neighbours and thought I'd share a few ideas:
- Taking my husband a cup of tea when he's working
- Having a snack ready when my children get home from school
- Finding my son's missing school jumper for him
- Buying the children small gifts
- Spending time cutting and sticking with my toddler instead of leaving him to it
- Sending a package of food (that's sitting in my cupboards when we don't eat it) to a neighbour who's struggling to feed her kids
- Making "sloppy" mashed potato the way my husband likes it
- Leaving a cheery message on my Dad's work answering machine for when he gets in on a dreary Monday morning
I also am planning on making extra honey cakes and apple cakes this year (I love to bake) and deliver them to various people who will be on their own this holiday, or getting by with only basics.
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"Do More Than Asked"
From Kindness: Making a Difference in People's Lives: Formulas, stories, and insights
By Zelig Pliskin
Printed with Permission of Shaar Press
There are people who prefer to do favors for others when they volunteer to do so. When they are asked, they often consider it a burden. The benefit of being asked by another person is that then you know for certain what this person’s needs actually are. Show that fulfilling this person’s request is something that you really want to do. How? By doing more than you have been asked to do.
At times we might do what we have been asked to do because we find it difficult to say no. We know that we should do acts of kindness and therefore do things out of embarrassment. Our going beyond the specifics of what was asked of us is an expression that our true inner will is to do acts of kindness.
Many people hesitate to ask for favors because they don’t like to be a burden to others. They don’t want others to do things for them just because those people would feel guilty for refusing. When you do more than you have been asked, you demonstrate your sincere willingness to help. We go the extra mile when we enjoy what we are doing or we feel that this is the right thing to do. Doing more than you have been asked will enable the recipient of your kindness to feel better about all that you have done for him before, are doing now, and will do for him in the future. The extra thing you do could be a relatively minor thing, but the benefits are major.
The author heard these examples from friends:
"I asked him to lend me five hundred dollars. I was overwhelmed when on his own he offered two thousand dollars and he told me, ‘Thank you for asking. It’s my pleasure.’ "
"I asked my friends if I could stay at their home for a few days. They told me their house was available for even a month. The entire week I was their guest I felt totally at home."
"I asked my neighbor if she could watch my children for a couple of hours so I could rest. My neighbor offered to have them stay overnight so I could get a good night’s sleep. I felt grateful beyond words."
"I asked a few questions about how to use my new computer. I was treated to a full three hour lesson."
"I asked for a lift and expected to walk from my neighbor’s house to my own. Instead, the driver went out of his way to take me the full distance that I needed."
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Although the content of these e-mails contains copyrighted material, Partners in Kindness allows users who register at our website to reprint them in print, on a website, or on an e-mail distribution list at no cost.
If you have permission to reprint this e-mail, please ensure that you reprint the entire e-mail (including this notice).
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