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KIND WORDS
Find Someone Who Can
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Sponsored in memory of L.S. ("Jug") Hurst, with profound gratitude for the countless kindnesses
he showed me and everyone he encountered. I will love you always, Daddy. - Boop
For more information about sponsorship contact info@...
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"Getting the Ghosts Out of My Closet"
The author wishes to remain anonymous
Edited by Shmuel Greenbaum
Printed with Permission of http://www.PartnersInKindness.org
When we moved into our new house, I was putting things into the hall closet and found two shoeboxes on the shelf. They were full of wonderful old family photos. I immediately called the previous owner and told them what I had found. The response: "Oh, those come with the house. They were there when we moved in and we did not know how to find the previous owner."
The boxes' presence really bothered me, as I knew that another family's precious memories were in our closet. I learned that their last name was
"Harris" from junk mail that came to the house and I began to ask neighbors if they had known the family and where they went. I had a few leads that led nowhere, including promises from others who would try to contact them.
A couple of years after first finding the photos, I took down the boxes and looked through them carefully. I found a book from a multi-class reunion of a small school in Fargo, North Dakota. The book had lists and I found the name Harris with my current address. But it showed the maiden name was "Miner". Then I looked for that name - thinking maybe there was a brother. I did find another woman whose maiden name was Miner. She lived in Fargo, according to this book. I called directory assistance and obtained the number for the family that was still at the same address.
What a surprise the lady had when I told her I was looking for Mary Miner Harris - her sister - and that I had her family photos. The sister in North
Dakota gave me Mary's mailing address in New Mexico and promised to tell her to expect a package from Georgia. In the package I included a letter that told her I was glad to finally get the Miner- Harris ghosts out of my closet!
Mary called me when she received the boxes and we cried together. She thought that they had fallen off the truck along with some other items during her move from Atlanta. She was so delighted that she decided to make a special photo album for all of her 7 children. A few months later, one of her daughters called me from South Carolina and came to visit me.
It was definitely worth my time and the money spent on the phone calls. A few weeks later, Mary sent me a silver serpent pin from New Mexico. I wear it often, and when someone asks me what it is, I tell them it is my Mitzvah (good deed) pin.
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"Find Someone Who Can"
From Kindness: Making a Difference in People's Lives: Formulas, stories, and insights
By Zelig Pliskin
Printed with Permission of Shaar Press
When you can¢t help someone yourself, assist the person you wish to help find someone else who can and will. Be aware of resource people who appreciate helping others.
* Someone who is housebound or in the hospital might need visitors. If you can¢t do it yourself, find people who are able to visit and influence them to do so.
* Someone who is deeply in debt needs help to raise large amounts of money. This problem could be beyond your personal ability to solve. Perhaps you can find some people who will be able to financially bail this person out of his distressful situation. Or, you might know someone you can ask
to advise this individual on what he can do to raise the necessary funds.
* Someone complains to you that they are having a very difficult time with their children. You might know someone who is knowledgeable about how to handle these situations. If you don¢t know someone who can help, you might know someone who knows someone else who can help.
* A group of individuals can get together to compile a list of resource people for solving various difficulties that could arise. They can then spread the word that their pooled knowledge can be accessed by calling specific telephone numbers.
* Larger cities might have many more resources than smaller towns. People who live in one of the places with fewer resources can find contacts in the larger cities and pass this on to others who need the information.
A general rule to remember is: As soon as you realize that you can¢t help someone in need, think of some people who might be
able to help. You might not be able to think of someone the moment you are asked, so keep it in mind or write it down. Then as soon as you think of a resource person, you can contact the person who is seeking assistance. Imagine the relief of the person you help when you contact him a few weeks later to pass on helpful information. He sees that you have been thinking about his welfare all this time.
One of my students related this story:
When people used to ask me to help them out in some way, I had an attitude, "There are some things that I am able to do and others I am not able. When I can¢t do anything, that¢s it. There¢s just nothing I can do." What helped change my attitude was when I needed a referral for a computer expert who could help me with a nonstandard problem. Most people told me that they couldn¢t help and left it at that. Then I happened to bump into a total stranger who said to me, "I have a friend who might be able to help. Give me your telephone number." He spoke to his friend who was able to help. This has served as a role model for me to look for others who can help when I can¢t.
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