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KIND WORDS Forgive Sponsored: In honor of the wedding anniversary Martin and Audrey Greenbaum In honor of the birthday of Eliyahu Dovid Hayman ======================================================================================== For information about sponsorship contact Info@... ======================================================================================== The author wishes to remain anonymous Edited by Shmuel Greenbaum Printed with Permission of http://www.PartnersInKindness.org My landlord lives in the apartment below me. He has been renovating and extending his house for almost a year; so we've had plumbers, and electricians, and other workers come into our apartment repeatedly to make repairs. The water has had to be shut done several times, the power cut more times than I can remember, and so on. Recently, their bathroom was ripped out, and I encouraged them (including their four small children) to come up and use my bathroom whenever they needed it instead of going down to the basement bathroom which was in the center of the construction zone. Two days turned into two weeks as often happens during construction, but we made the best of it. Finally, things were coming together, with most of the heavy work done. They got their renovated bathroom back, and I began to miss their 3-year-old's plaintive "I needoo maakkkkkkeeeeeeeeeeeee" right after I got into the shower. And then, last Friday, when the temperature had dropped to well below freezing, my neighbor called just as I was getting out of bed, to say the water main had frozen overnight. There was no water, and therefore no heat! They were trying to get someone to fix the problem, but couldn't tell me when things would be back to normal. I washed up with seltzer! and went to work. They called me several times with updates, but the situation seemed worse by the minute. Due to the construction, the water main was not properly insulated or as deeply buried as it should have been, and even if they got it thawed, it would probably freeze again due to low temperature. They arranged to go away for the weekend, and offered to find me a place, but I said I would stick it out with space heaters. Meanwhile, out of desperation, my neighbor took a sledge hammer, smashed the newly set cement, and dug down to expose the water main. He worked for hours, but his wife called again to say the situation seemed hopeless. She tried to apologize for the inconvenience, but I told her not to worry. "Things happen. It will be resolved sooner or later," and "it's not worth getting upset over." She was shocked by my calm response, and said she couldn't believe I wasn't angry. So I said, "Should I yell at you? What will that accomplish? I'll be mad at you, and you'll be mad at me for yelling at you, and when the water does comes back on, it won't wash away the ill feelings my yelling would have caused." She was really touched, and said she wishes other people could think along those lines. We ended the conversation with my reiteration that she shouldn't worry. I knew they were trying to resolve the situation, and I wasn't blaming them. It felt good to hear the relief in her voice as she said goodbye. It felt even better when she called back not five minutes later to say "the water's back on!" It stayed on thanks to the space heater that was set up inches away from the pipe to keep it from freezing again. But best of all, our relationship stayed intact. "Forgive" From Kindness: Making a Difference in People's Lives: Formulas, stories, and insights By Zelig Pliskin Printed with Permission of Shaar Press At times the greatest kindness you can do for someone is to forgive. Some people will ask you for forgiveness. Others will lack the awareness or courage or humility to ask your forgiveness. Forgive even if you aren’t asked to do so. This can be extremely difficult. And that is why it’s so elevating. When we forgive others, we are forgiven. This consciousness will make it easier to forgive. When we forgive others, we let go of the resentment and anger that is so dangerous to our physical and spiritual well-being. The realization that anyone who comes to us to ask forgiveness is actually a messenger from our loving Creator and powerful King makes it easier to forgive. Our mind is too precious to fill it with thoughts and feelings of hatred and animosity. A mind full of compassion and kindness finds it easy to forgive, and this is the type of thinking that elevates and uplifts. Consider these stories from my students: I used to find it difficult to forgive others if they wronged me. Then one day I unintentionally said something that offended a person who was mentally unbalanced. After that, every time I met that person he would repeat quite loudly, "I don’t forgive you." I asked him to forgive me, but he would refuse. "You’re not really sorry," he would say. "This is ridiculous," I said to myself. "Why is he holding on to resentment for so long?" Then I realized that I am guilty of the same thing. Of course, what I am angry about is more serious than what this person is angry about. And I am more subtle in my approach to non-forgiving. But what I habitually did was at the core just as out of line as what this person did. I was committed to have a broader perspective and to forgive. * * * I met a person who told me that a turning point in his life was when a homeowner caught him trying to steal valuables. The thief begged him not to call the police. The owner looked him straight in the eye and said, "I will forgive you and let you go, but on one condition. I need you to promise me that you will never do this again. I am not naïve to think that everyone who would make this promise would keep it. But I think that you will." I felt tremendously grateful to him, and said, "I promise." The man told me to come back for weekly meetings and he would serve as my mentor in how I could straighten out my life. His forgiveness totally transformed the entire course of my life. * * * I spoke against someone and then deeply regretted it. I went to ask his forgiveness. This was exceedingly difficult for me since I felt embarrassed. "I understand how tempting it can be to speak against others," he said to me. "I forgive you." I appreciated his kind way of saying this to me and resolved to be much more careful not to speak against others in the future. --------------------------------------------------------- Great News! With a Tax-Deductible Dedication starting at only $50 Please help us! We need to raise $15,000 for production costs. Book Dedications:
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