KIND WORDS
Finding Strengths
A Happy Surprise in the Mailbox
The author wishes to remain anonymous
Edited by Shmuel Greenbaum
Printed with Permission of
http://www.PartnersInKindness.org
I am fortunate to have friends in different places across the globe. But sadly, I'm not the best at keeping in touch. Often when I think of my friends, I'll pick up a note card and pen them a short letter, no matter how close or how far away they are.
One winter day I sat and wrote a small note to a friend I hadn't spoken to in a couple of months, posted the letter, and felt good that I knew she'd get a happy surprise in the mailbox in a few days time. I put it at the back of my mind and went on with life.
A few days later, I got a phone call from her—she was in tears. She had been going through a rough time (which I didn't know because we weren't in close contact),
and she had just received the short letter. It made a huge impact on her. She'd been confused and very upset, but this short note reminded her that there are people who love her unconditionally.
Knowing that someone is thinking of you and loves you—even from so far away—can make a huge impact. Since the magic of finding a hand written letter in the mail is so precious, I find it the perfect way to send a little bit of love.
This incident actually spurred me to increase my note-writing to sitting down with a note card as soon as a friend pops into my head. I now write the note before having them float in my head for a week or two—this way they know I'm thinking of them.
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"Finding Strengths"
From Kindness: Making a Difference in People's Lives: Formulas, stories, and insights
By Zelig Pliskin
Printed with Permission of Shaar Press
Help people find their strengths. We all have more inner resources than we realize. If they lie dormant, they are like diamonds buried deep in one’s backyard. The potential for wealth is there but it won’t be utilized. So look for people’s potential strengths and point them out in a way that is acceptable to them. These are strengths of memory and intelligence. These are talents and skills that can be developed into expertise. These are insights and
creativity.
Once you express a strength in any area even once, you have the ability to upgrade that strength in more areas of your life many more times and in many more contexts. This means that if you have the courage to speak up even once you can speak up many more times when it is appropriate. If you can learn one word of a language, you can learn an entire language when you are determined and patient. If you can be patient in one situation, you can be patient in many different situations. If you can concentrate while reading anything, you can learn to concentrate in many more contexts. Amazing, isn’t it!
Once you believe that you personally can upgrade your strengths in all contexts, you can teach this to others. Theoretically you could teach this to others even if you don’t apply it yourself. But if you don’t exemplify what you expound, your message is not likely to be very effective. So applying your strengths in all contexts
is a prerequisite for helping others do so. This is one of the greatest gifts you can give your family and friends.
When someone tells you that they can’t do something, ask them if they have ever done this even once. "If you can do it once, it means your brain knows how to do it," you can tell them.
"Yes, but I have done this only in a limited way in another area," they might protest.
"Since you have already done this, if you do the exact same thing again, you are likely to get the same results, aren’t you?" is your response.
And if you have helped even one person get in touch with one strength, you can get that person in touch with additional strengths. And if you have done this for one person, you can do this for many people.
One of my students told me this story:
I used to view myself as being uncreative. I remember the day a prominent neighbor told me that I was creative.
"Yes, I did a couple
of things that might seem creative," I argued against my own best interests. "But I’m not really creative. And what I did wasn’t totally original."
"Look at it objectively," I was told. "You have to admit there were elements of creativity in what you did."
He was correct. There were creative aspects in what I had done. And from then on, I have viewed myself as creative. This has made a major impact on my entire life. I now feel an obligation to help other people discover their strengths the way someone helped me find mine.
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Names of people, places, and other details mentioned in these stories may have been changed to protect privacy.
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