For those who think it would be scientifically adequate to substitute
human for groundhog in the annual seasonal ritual, you obviously are not
aware of the theological underpinnings of groundhog as ultimate
predictive source. Please consult with Dave Pile. I think some other
kind of marmot might work, but nothing as evolutionarily advanced as
human.

It is obvious that we need to get these "scientists" more edumacated, and
this is another excellent arguement for why we need the teaching of
creation theory and intelligent design in the classroom. Remember, each
creature has its chosen place in the Grand Scheme, and n'er the twain
shall meet.