Hi Jan,

I'm guessing you've already had the appointment by now, since it's just morning
in Australia and I've just received your email.

I'm really intrigued by the client saying that the therapy is not helping her
enough because it's not leading to enough change. Many clients with Anorexia
would say that they don't want to change, so it seems like the fact that she's
saying that change isn't happening fast enough, means that there's something to
work with there. Do you know what change she's looking for? Even if the change
she wants is a control driven agenda, underneath that, there will probably be
some some way to link that to her values, i.e., "If X(whatever she states she
wants to change) were to be different, then what would you be able to do in your
life?"

I've always found it a tight balance with clients with Anorexia between
encouraging them to come, knowing that for some of them it's hard for them to
find a way to allow themselves to be there and so for the time being the
therapist has to do that. AND then on the other end, respecting when they decide
they don't want to come. It's easy to hold too tight to them, or too loose.

Had she talked with you in the last session about not wanting to come or was
this out of the blue. I generally ask clients that say on the phone that they
don't want to come, whether they'd be willing to come in and discuss face to
face and to have a chance to say goodbye. It just gives you a bit more space to
help them clarify what they really want to do, cause you've got longer and when
you get to the hard bits, it's not as easy to end it as it is on the phone (by
handing phone over or hanging up), so you've got a little more chance of being
able to work through the hard bits.

Also, it's probably not that relevant, but can you tell me what "iView" is? I've
never heard of it.

Carla.

>>> Jan Martz <jan_martz@...> 02-Apr-08 6:39 pm >>>
Dear Groups
I don't know whether anyone of you will be awake yet. I just had a phone call
from a client whom I have seen 5 times so far, introduced iView and life manual.
She is suffering from anorexia, BMI around 15 and sinking rapidly. Living with
her mother who is desperate. She just told me on the phone that she does not
want to come anymore, that this therapy, this "iView stuff" is not helping her
enough, not enough change. That she is a burden for her surroundings, who are
telling her that it cannot go on like this. I responded with sympathy, expressed
respect for her opinion, expressed my openness that she can come any time.
Expressed that I cannot guarantee how quickly her life will change, that I would
be willing to commit myself to attempt to be an instrument for her to develop
her life. Expressed my conviction that her life is full of potential, and that I
wish that she can develop this potential. Asked whether I could do anything for
her, maybe speak to
her mother. She then passed the phone to her mother who expressed her
desperation, her unwillingness to let her daughter stop therapy, her need for
help as a mother. I offered to see her today with or without her daughter during
the scheduled appointment which is in 4 hours (8am eastern time). Any support /
suggestions would be very welcome.
thank you
Jan


----- Original Message ----
From: Patricia Aptaker <pmaptaker@...>
To: Patt Aptaker <pmaptaker@...>; Susan Chiddix <dr.chiddix@...>;
Joshua Jacobs <joshuaxjacobs@...>; Paula Johnson
<paulabjohnsonlmhc@...>; Jan Martz <jan_martz@...>; Jean Meier
<jlmeir@...>; Jean Meier <jlmier@...>; Kathryn Montgomery
<kathrynm@...>; Annie Murrell <aheart@...>; Kevin Polk
<polkkev@...>; Joe Wagner <joewag88@...>
Sent: Wednesday, April 2, 2008 5:04:09 AM
Subject: ACT Teleclass - Wednesday, 4/2/08, 4:00 p.m. Eastern


Hi Guys - just a reminder.

If you have a chance look over your emails since last session on challenges and
questions. We can start the session with any followup.

Also attached is an article by Kevin on Creative Hopelessness with the iView.

For community marketing ideas, consider the following:
I attached a couple of articles I wrote for a local magazine in Baton Rouge,
Louisiana, called City Social. I write an article every other weekend and call
the column "Coach's Corner." ACT is really cool to write popular articles
about.

Also check out these website pages from local university for a class I do there:
http://appl003.lsu.edu/slas/leisureweb.nsf/$Content/Calendar+View?OpenDocument
Go under view by category
then Family Matters and Personal Enrichment
then Acceptance and Change in Everyday Life

Some ideas - Kevin can share on his stress program based on ACT.

Talk tomorrow,

Patt


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