Any truth about a reality is valid only in a given context. In all other contexts it is not likely to make any sense.
There may be many different truths to explain any reality. Each truth makes sense in a particular context, but is normally nonsense in other contexts. Despite all good intentions, we often have serious disagreements regarding reality with others in our personal and professional life. Each person in the disagreement feels that he/she is saying the correct thing (truth), whereas others are talking nonsense. It is important to understand that it is possible that most people in the disagreement are actually speaking the truth; however their truths make sense in different contexts.
This insight became very clear to me recently while playing with my 23 month old toddler. One of her favorite toys is "Piglet" (of Winnie the Pooh fame). It is a stuffed toy made up of soft pink fur. She used to call it "Piggie" till a few days back, however nowadays she is very confused about what it is. We told her it is 'Pink', while trying to teach her colors; we told her it is 'fur' while trying to make her familiar with textures; we told her it is "Piglet", while she was watching "Winnie The Pooh' cartoon; we told her it is a stuffed toy; and we also told her that it is soft and cute.
Each of this is true about her 'Piggie", however if she points at her "Piggie", and asks me what it is without any context, I am at loss of what to say. It is so many different things depending upon the context. It is a Pig, it is the cartoon character Piglet, it is a toy, it is a stuffed toy, it is pink, it is soft and cute, it is fur, etc.
Most of us adults deal with far more complex realities than what my toddler is dealing with. Therefore whenever in disagreement, it is very important to try and understand the context in which each person is talking. Most disagreements would disappear if (a) you could step in the other person's shoes and see their context, and (b) take efforts to make sure that others see your context.
For you to be at peace with yourself, you need to be at peace in each of the multiple lives that you are living.
We
live multiple lives in our lifetime. Whereas at a subconscious level we
are aware of it, we seldom look at it from this perspective. We broadly
categorize our activities and environment as personal or professional
based on whether it is home, friends, work or non-work related.
I
want you to consider for a moment that the differentiation in your
personal and professional life is not only external but is internal as
well; i.e., you are a very different person in each life. In fact, if
you isolate your personal and professional life and look at yourself
from a third person's perspective you will see two very different
individuals.
I would also encourage you to observe carefully and
identify the multiple primary lives you are leading, rather than just
classifying your activities as personal and professional. For example,
I live three primary lives; a family life, a product manager's life,
and a writer's life. I am a very different person in each of my three
lives. My focus is different, my way of dealing with others is
different, what defines my success or failure is different, what
excites or depresses me is different and the way I conduct myself is
different.
As a family person
my focus is primarily on the well being of my family, taking care of
financial and emotional needs, making sure that my child grows up to be
a fine individual, going for holidays and outings, celebrating
festivals with extended family and friends, getting a life insurance to
help my family even after my death (something that you only do for your
family), building assets for post retirement security, etc.
As a product manager,
my focus is on ensuring long term sustained revenue and growth of my
product. Understanding customer needs, competitive landscape and
emerging technologies. Speaking at conferences, listening to customer
complaints, reviewing product bug list with quality assurance and
engineering. Defining the future roadmap for the product etc.
As a writer,
my focus is to deeply observe life and people and to share thought
provoking insights through my writings. Interacting with readers, from
over hundred countries, having extremely diverse backgrounds and
cultures. Discussing feedback and comments. Marketing and promotion to
reach potential readers. Learning technologies that help me make my
blog more attractive and pleasant, etc.
For you to
be living powerfully, you need to make progress and be at peace in each
of your multiple lives. Making progress in one life at the cost of
others will lead to unrest. You need to balance your time and energies
between each of your primary lives. Identify your primary lives and evaluate each life in isolation. Do what it takes to be at peace in each of your life.
You
are like a cup of coffee. What is visible to the external world is the
cup and not the coffee inside. What is visible to you is the coffee.
And your experience of life is the warmth, taste and aroma of the
coffee. The experience can only be felt. It is not visible to anyone
including you.
The
cup is how you come across to the world. The cup represents the visible
actions that you take, the things that you do and the words that you
speak. The world makes a picture of you from what is visible to them.
They have no idea of what is inside. They do not know how the coffee
looks. The coffee inside might be awful, but if the cup is made of
delicate ceramic, the world would look at it positively. On the other
hand, you may be a very good person inside but the world may ignore you
as a cheap plastic cup because your goodness is not visible to them.
The
coffee inside is what you are to yourself. It comes from what you think
and believe. It comes from all your thoughts, actions, experiences and
feelings from childhood till date. You are the only person who has
witnessed everything about you. Others may have caught a glimpse here
or there, but it is only you who knows what you are. Normally, what we
are inside is never closely related to how the world sees us. Many of
us have experienced this very closely. This is simply because the
coffee inside is not visible to others. They can only see the cup.
Finally,
the experience of having the coffee is your experience of life. It is
not visible to anyone. Only you can feel the warmth, taste and aroma. A
good experience makes you feel satisfied, relaxed and at peace, whereas
a bad experience fills you with stress, dissatisfaction, and
discomfort. The experience is given by your value system, your
acceptance of yourself, and your acceptance of how the world sees you.
You enjoy your coffee best when you are not concerned about how the cup
or the coffee looks; rather you are focussed on enjoying the coffee.
The look of the coffee and the cup does influence your experience of
having coffee. But if you introspect, most of you will see that the
biggest spoilsport is your non-acceptance of yourself, and of how the
world sees you. Most happy and satisfied people are those who accept
themselves, and also accept how the world sees them.
To
accept yourself and to accept how the world sees you, the coffee and
the cup needs to be in sync with your value system. So go ahead and
live life in tune with your value system, and enjoy each moment of
living it. It doesn't matter whether you are a beggar or a king.
Awareness changes your view of life. Practice helps you live by the new view.
Many readers find my insights thought provoking but find it difficult, if not impossible, to live by them. They ask me if I really live by what I share. My simple answer is no. If I were able to perfectly live by all insights that I share, I would become too perfect to be human. So I don't live by them, but I do strive to live by them. I consistently practice living by them. And this practice would continue through my lifetime. There would be times when I will fail, but there would also be times when I will succeed. With practice, the number of successes is likely to increase.
Awareness and practice are the keys. The purpose of sharing my insights is to increase awareness of some new perspectives to life. Once you are aware of something, it changes the rest of your life, whether or not you do anything about it. And if you do decide to practice it, the change is more dramatic and faster.
There was a time when smokers were not aware of the ill effects of smoking. Now it is a well known fact that "smoking kills". Do people still smoke? Yes, they do. But I am sure people who are aware, smoke less than they would have otherwise. Most of them discourage their children from smoking. The awareness also motivates many smokers to practice giving up smoking. Some are able to give up smoking easily. Some practice for a long time before they are able to give up. And there are those who constantly practice and reduce the number they smoke, but are never able to give up.
If any insight touches a chord in you, practice living by it. Do not give up if you fail a few times. Keep practicing and you will see the difference it makes to your life.
Awareness changes your view of life. Practice helps you live by the new view.
Many
readers find my insights thought provoking but find it difficult, if
not impossible, to live by them. They ask me if I really live by what I
share. My simple answer is no. If I were able to perfectly live by all
insights that I share, I would become too perfect to be human. So I
don't live by them, but I do strive to live by them. I consistently practice
living by them. And this practice would continue through my lifetime.
There would be times when I will fail, but there would also be times
when I will succeed. With practice, the number of successes is likely
to increase.
Awareness and practice are the keys. The purpose of sharing my insights is to... more
To be white is to be an Angel. To be black is to be a Devil. To be gray is to be a Human.
Humans
are of varying shades of gray. Their personalities are a combination of
white and black, godliness and deviousness. To expect a human to not
have any flaw would be to expect that human to an Angel. Humans are not
Angels. To condemn a human as all evil is to condemn that human to be a
Devil. Humans are not devils.
I am not talking about the
minuscule percentage of rare humans who by their deeds have become
comparable to Angels or to Devils. I am talking about the large
majority of humans. People like you and me. Most of us do things that
may not be right. But we also do things that are right. Sometimes we do
things that are evil. But many... http://www.letstalkinsights.com/2008/04/human-shades-of-gray.html
Any activity that you enjoy is a celebration of your happiness. You wouldn't have enjoyed it if you were not happy.
Each one of us enjoys certain activities that makes us feel better and makes us feel happy. The activities are different for different people. Some people enjoy watching movies, some go on a long drive, some go out for dinner, some play sports, and others indulge in a zillion other...
Very often we are so focussed on future that we lose sight of gifts in our present.
It
is important to design our future and move towards it. However, this
should not be at the cost of being ignorant of our present. It is more
important to be aware of our present and be conscious of the gifts that
we already have. Failure to acknowledge your present would mean a life
full of frustrations, simply because you step into your future only
when it becomes present.
The story below illustrates this beautifully. I came across this story multiple times on the internet. The author is unknown.
A boat docked in a tiny Mexican village. An American tourist complimented the Mexican fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them.
"Not very long," answered the Mexican. "But then, why didn't you stay out longer and catch more?" asked the American.
The Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family. The American asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"
"I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, and take a siesta with my wife. In the evenings, I go into the village to see my friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar, and sing a few songs. I have a full life."
The American interrupted, "I have an MBA and I can help you! You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat." "And after that?" asked the Mexican. "With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can then negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City, Los Angeles, or even New York City! From there you can direct your huge new enterprise."
"How long would that take?" asked the Mexican. "Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years," replied the American.
"And after that?" "Afterwards? Well my friend, that's when it gets really interesting," answered the American, laughing. "When your business gets really big, you can start buying and selling stocks and make millions!"
"Millions? Really? And after that?" asked the Mexican. "After that you'll be able to retire, live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children, catch a few fish, take a siesta with your wife and spend your evenings drinking and enjoying your friends."
The Mexican looked confused, "But... I already live this life"
You are like a cup of coffee. What
is visible to the external world is the cup and not the coffee inside.
What is visible to you is the coffee. And your experience of life is
the warmth, taste and aroma of the coffee. The experience can only be
felt. It is not visible to anyone including you.
The
cup is how you come across to the world. The cup represents the visible
actions that you take, the things that you do and the words that you
speak. The world makes a picture of you from what is visible to them.
They have no idea of what is inside. They do not know how the coffee
looks. The coffee inside might be awful, but if the cup is made of
delicate ceramic, the world would look at it positively. On the other
hand, you may be a very good person inside but the world may ignore you
as a cheap plastic cup because your goodness is not visible to them.
The
coffee inside is what you are to yourself. It comes from what you think
and believe. It comes from all your thoughts, actions, experiences and
feelings from childhood till date. You... more
Forward this insightful poster to your friends, family and network... Nothing bad will happend if you do not forward it :-) However, you will feel good if you share powerful thoughts with people in your life.
You can be a leader only when others grant you this privilege.
You are a leader when there are people who; trust you, get inspired by you, feel positive in your presence, have faith in what you are saying, and
are willing to take the risk of accepting your opinions and views
You can, at best, strive to have these qualities. You will become a leader only when others perceive these qualities in you.
You can re-energize and renew focus by taking short breaks to clear out persistent thoughts from your mind.
On
any average day, thousands of thoughts flow through our mind. Each of
these thoughts can flow away in a split second or it can persist in our
mind for hours. The thoughts can be just about anything; previous day's
experiences, concerns for tomorrow, events that happened years ago,
dreams for the years to come, something in the news and so on.
At
any time your energy and focus are influenced by multiple factors such
as mood, type of thoughts, physical health, fatigue, and many more. One
of the important influences is the number of thoughts that are
persisting in your mind at that time. We normally start our day fully
energized and with no persisting thoughts. As we progress through the
day more and more thoughts start accumulating in our mind affecting
both our energy and focus. On some days you are flooded with thoughts
within a few minutes of waking up, on others you have a calm morning
and the thoughts build up slowly. In any case, on most days your mind
is full of thoughts by afternoon.
Short breaks, to clear your
mind of all persisting thoughts, can work wonders on re-energizing you
and renewing your focus. These breaks can be in the form of a 20 minute
nap, or a 10 minute walk... more
------ Message from Author
1. Please visit the blog and leave your comments and feedback - http://www.letstalkinsights.com/2008/02/re-energize-and-renew-focus-in-short.html
2. If you like this insights, please forward it to your friends, family and network.
Your future will be consistent with your self image. You can change your future by changing your self image.
Most
of us have a self-image and we live life consistent with that image.
All our actions and decisions are influenced by what we think we can or
cannot do or achieve. Our self image is our judgments and beliefs
regarding our capabilities. Whenever we are faced by any action,
decision or planning we evaluate each possibility with our self image
and move forward accordingly; "I think I can do this...", "I can't do
this...", "I can never become a ...", "I am sure, that one day I
will...".
Our self image is shaped primarily by our past
experiences - successes and failures, feedback and comments received
from others, our upbringing and childhood events. If you carefully
analyze your self-image you will be surprised to find that many of its
aspects are shaped by a single event, or comment. You will find that
many significant aspects have been shaped by experiences that now seem
very insignificant and almost forgotten, yet they have had a permanent
effect...
If you truly believe in a prophecy, your actions and decisions will make it come true.
A
respected gypsy woman looked in her crystal ball and prophesized that
the beautiful young girl sitting across the table will get married to a
Greek gentleman. Years passed and many suitors came for her hand in
marriage, but she turned them down as they were not from Greece. Her
beauty attracted many handsome and rich men to court her, but she did
not let herself fall in love with anyone. Till one day, she came across
an average looking Greek gentleman looking for work. She invited him
home, and helped him get a job at her father's factory. She knew he was
the man for her as prophesized by the old woman. She did everything she
could to help him and take care of him. Eventually he fell in love with
her and... more
------------------------------- Please do send me your feedback and comments. If you like this article, please forward it to your friends, family and network.
The winner is a person who took the risk of losing and participated in the race.
Most people do not participate in the race simply because they are
afraid of losing. They are waiting for a favourable situation where
winning is guaranteed or highly probable. They do a lot of planning and
analysis to determine their odds for winning the race. Some "ready-to-be"
entrepreneurs have not yet launched their venture because they are
waiting for an idea which is a sure winner. Most of us prefer taking "calculated risks", i.e. risks where the risk of risk is very low. Your chances of winning are almost certain if and only if you... full article
Education is only a small source of
learning. The primary sources of learning are your interactions and
experiences with yourself, others, nature, and the environment
Education
is information and experiences imparted to students in a regulated,
protected, experimental and stimulated environment. However, education
is only one source of information and experiences. Other primary
sources are the interactions that we have, since birth, with people,
nature and environment around us; and the interactions that we have
with our own self in form of introspection, dreams and
self-conversation – the voice in our head.
Learning is the
assimilation of information and experiences with our `self'. Learning
is analyzing the information and experiences that we have received,
relating them to our existing learnings, putting our own... more
Common sense is acquired knowledge. Unlike instinct, you are not born with it. Common sense is unique for each individual.
Most
of us have gone through the frustration of dealing with people who do
not seem to have common sense. Very often, common sense appears to be
most uncommon and rare. Unfortunately it is true. Common sense is very uncommon.
This is because what is common for you may not be common for someone
else. Common sense is something that is acquired through experience.
Since everyone goes through different experiences in life, common sense
for each person is unique.
In England, it is common sense that
shoes left outside the door by hotel guests need polishing, whereas in
US the common sense is to throw them in trash. For the Japanese it is
common sense to... more
---------------- Please let me have your feedback and comments. Also, if you like this insight, please forward it to your family, friends and network. I have created an iGoogle gadget that you can add to your google.com page. Try it out by clicking here .
Uncertainty is a truth of life. Take action despite uncertainty. Do not wait for certainty before taking action.
We
are normally apprehensive of uncertainty as it takes away our feeling
of control over the future. Uncertainty, however, is as certain as
death. You have no way of being certain about how your life would be a
year or a month from now. In fact you cannot even be sure of tomorrow,
or even today. In this article, I do not intend to deal with
uncertainty relating to natural calamities such as unforeseen
earthquakes, or health risks such as sudden heart attacks. My focus is
on uncertainty in our day to day life.
The root cause of uncertainty lies in the very design of life. I had touched upon it it in one of my earlier posts; Life is Like a Game of Cards.
From this perspective, life depends on four primary factors. The cards
that got dealt to you, the cards that got dealt to others, the way you
play your cards and... more
Being courageous does not imply
being fearless. Fear and courage go hand in hand. Fear is necessary for
survival, whereas courage is required to succeed.
Fear
is the acknowledgment of potential danger and the stimulus to take
action for protection. It sets you in action for facing danger or
fleeing from it. Fear may result from actual danger, e.g. facing a
tiger in a jungle. Or, it may result from imagined danger e.g. fear of
failure. In either case it sets you in action for protecting yourself.
If you are fearless, then potential danger is not likely to generate
protective reaction. A fearless soldier is likely to get shot easily. A
fearless investor is (more... )
------------------------------- Please share your comments and feedback by visiting Lets Talk Insights. Please forward this powerful insight to your friends, family and network.
Freedom is the right to choose. It goes hand in hand with commitments and responsibilities. Freedom itself is also a matter of choice.
You are free when you make your own decisions. With decisions, comes responsibility for outcome of the decisions. With responsibility comes commitment to generate the desired outcome. Freedom takes away the luxury of being a mere observer and going through life mechanically, letting someone else take the decisions and the responsibility for your actions. Freedom brings you out in the open and puts the burden of responsibility on you. Freedom forces you to come out of your comfort zone and take control of your life, situations and circumstances.
It is glamorous to talk about freedom, but how many of us really want to be free? Being free is difficult, painful and hard work. How many of us want to take decisions, commit ourselves to the decisions, and take responsibility for the outcome? In my understanding, all of us want to be free, but most of us shirk away from the responsibilities and commitments that come with it.
If you want to live a great life, I invite you to embrace freedom and accept everything that comes with it.... the commitment and the responsibility.
We are at our creative best in adverse situations. Each one of us is very capable of finding innovative solutions to face any challenge that life throws at us.
In adverse situations we are under pressure to change something in our lives that is not working. We are forced to look at ways in which we can overcome adversity. Adversity puts a strong demand on us to innovate for survival. It forces us to be different than what we have been being. Some of the most successful people and businesses that the world has seen have grown out of adversity.
Wal-Mart is one of the best examples of how adversity can force you to innovate. Wal-Mart started operations in isolated Bentonville in Arkansas. They did not have any advantage over their competitors in terms of location, resources, manpower or suppliers. The only way they could compete was on the basis of lowest prices to customers. To achieve this objective, the entire organisation got creative around reducing cost and increasing efficiencies. So much so that, today, Wal-Mart is the largest retailer in the world with the lowest cost structure and the most efficient supply chain. Some of their methods are highly criticized, and rightly so. However, it does not change the fact that their innovations in reducing cost and increasing efficiencies has revolutionized the global economy.
If you are faced with an adverse situation, be creative.
The winner is a person who took the risk of losing and participated in the race. Most people do not participate in the race simply because they are afraid of losing. They are waiting for a favourable situation where winning is guaranteed or highly probable. They do a lot of planning and analysis to determine their odds for winning the race. Some "ready-to-be" entrepreneurs have not yet launched...
[A Question of Perspective does not have any right or wrong answer. Each answer is a perspective that may be unique or shared. I invite you to share your perspective with all readers]
You run out of gas (petrol) just 10 meters from the gas station (petrol pump). Are you lucky that you ran out of gas so near the gas station and you can easily push your car in? OR, are you unlucky that the gas...
Practice makes perfect. Perfection is a moving target. Practice is continuously challenging your limits to gain perfection.
Consider you are new at the game of darts. Initially you start throwing darts from a ten feet distance. Assume that your darts land fifteen inches away, on an average, from the bulls-eye. This is your limit as a beginner. You can challenge this limit through practice which...
Hi Cynsmith(?)
Thank you for being the first real member to join this community. I am
hoping that the discussions in this community would be very rewarding
for all members.
Its a new community, but I am sure more people will join this
community soon. The wait should be worth it.
Thank you once again
Aseem - Insights For Life
http://letstalkinsights.blogspot.com
Feeling Successful
is an emotion that is not really related to Success.
Consider that everyone in this world is
running a race. Everyone is somewhere in the race. The beggars and homeless are
somewhere towards the end, whereas the likes of Bill Gates and Ophra Winfrey
are somewhere towards the front. You are also somewhere in the race, running
and trying to move ahead of those in front of you.
Also, consider that
everyone is suffering from myopia. Therefore, no matter where you are in the
race, you can only see 5 people ahead of you and 5 people behind you. A small
shop owner somewhere in the line can only see and compare with similar 5 people
ahead, and 5 people behind. This shop owner cannot even… Full
Post