Hi Everyone,

I just read Sara's article and joined this group. Sara, thank you for
writing the article! It feels wonderfully reassuring to find other
scientist moms out there. My story is that I started my PhD with a 7
month old baby. The first two years were really hard. But, I was
able to complete my field work and am now writing my dissertation- my
son is four and a half years old now and its much easier. I can't
believe he'll be starting kindergarten next year! My husband and I
work together but also had full time care when my son turned 1.5
years old. Before that I did similar to what Carolyn did with going
in part time and having a babysitter at the house. I agree with Sara
and Carolyn that having a baby in your life makes you much more
efficient. Now that I'm completing my degree...I'll be defending in
March...and I have two chapters complete, my husband and I decided we
wanted to have another baby (our last one). I'm just wondering when
I should tell my advisor I am pregnant; at this point I'm only three
weeks. My advisor and I still have some field work we are
collaborating on. I think he will be supportive because he loves
children and has two of his own, but at the same time I still have
misgivings about letting him down because it will cause some
inconvenience.

Its nice to hear everyone's stories and encouragement!

Betsey


--- In scienceandfamilies@yahoogroups.com, "carolynkurle" <kurle@...>
wrote:
>
> Hi Flore
>
> Thanks for sharing your experience! It's amazing that you are
through
> your Ph.D. and only 26 years old - congratulations.
>
> It feels very uncertain when you are pregnant or planning to have a
> child as to how things will fall into place regarding your career
and
> work life. I assumed that things would be a certain way and found
out
> that they were totally different. For instance, I was really amazed
> and surprised at how much I wanted to be home with my son as much as
> possible especially at the beginning. I greatly underestimated the
> power of the biological pull that a child has on its mother. That
> said, I was also grateful
> to have my work because it was and continues to be a very fulfilling
> aspect of my life. Taking care of a little one is hard work and
it's
> a great "break" to be able to exercise your mind and immerse
yourself
> in science during work time.
>
> My son is 19 months old and I am currently in my post-doc. I was
> pregnant and had my son while I was still in graduate school and
> managed to do all of my last minute lab work before he was born so
> that all I had to do after he came was analyze data and write. I
was
> able to do this part-time with the aid of a great fellowship, a
> supportive husband who co-parented and also worked part-time, and,
> after my son turned 1, a great babysitter who helped us out 7
> hours/week.
>
> Now that I'm in a post-doc position, I still only come into work
> part-time (I'm at the office 25 hours/week) and my husband co-
parents
> and we now have a sitter coming in 9 hours/week. The main thing
I've
> done is become extremely efficient and I've cut out most of the
> extraneous stuff that takes up a lot of time (my email
correspondence
> is WAY down).
>
> Once your baby comes, you will see what works for you and your
> partner. I encourage you to be flexible, be willing to be open to
the
> experience, and, if it turns out to be what you need, then try hard
to
> carve out the time that you need to be fulfilled in your career.
> Having a space at home that you can escape to in order to write
really
> helps especially if you are breastfeeding. Then you can be close,
but
> still have a space to work. It's important that you set aside the
> time away from your baby so that you can really focus on the task of
> writing your dissertation. That's where the supportive partner
comes
> in (or a good babysitter). Leaving your baby with a sitter is a lot
> easier when you are just in the next room writing and can come
attend
> to things if you are needed. That may be a good way to start back
to
> working while still being close for your baby.
>
> My dissertation advisors both have small children and spouses in
> academia, so they were really supportive of me having a child. They
> worried some (I think) about me finishing on time, but ultimately,
> they really supported me working at home a lot and provided me with
> great role models of how to incorporate academia and family. I had
> trouble working during my first trimester because I was exhausted
and
> felt sick, so I worked at home and that was just fine. My current
> post-doctoral mentor is also very very supportive and expecting his
> first child in January. He is fine with me being at the office
> part-time as long as I continue to be productive. These are the
sorts
> of situations that we need to encourage and that are hopefully
> becoming the norm. Without this support, I don't think it would
have
> been possible to have a child and continue in academia.
>
> We'll see how it works as I transition into the next phase of my
> career after the post-doc.
>
> Best to you Flore in your pregnancy and in this transition away from
> being "just" a scientist to being a mom AND a scientist! It's a
> delicate balancing act, but know that there are a lot of us out here
> going through the same things. And that it IS very possible to be
> fulfilled BOTH as a mom and as a scientist. Especially as we
> encourage the continuation of supportive work environments and as we
> continue to see more and more examples of successful scientists who
> also are successful parents. I think we are very near a tipping
point
> and with women making up the majority of ecology graduate students,
it
> will just be more and more normal to see the needs of families taken
> into account in the academic career path. At least that's my
hopeful
> perspective!
>
> Best to everyone,
> Carolyn
>
> --- In scienceandfamilies@yahoogroups.com, "viard_cretat_flore"
> <viard_cretat_flore@> wrote:
> >
> > Hello everybody and especially Sara,
> >
> > I read your article in Frontiers in Ecology and Environment (and
by
> > the way discovered this group :) and found it very useful for
young
> > scientists and young mothers/fathers. When deciding to have a
baby, it
> > is extremely hard to know how you will able to continue to work
while
> > the baby will be here. Families are not always visible in the
> > workplace and colleagues tend to avoid to say that they must leave
> > their work early because of their children. Most of my colleagues
also
> > waited to have a permanent position to start to think to a
family, so
> > they had their first child around 35 years old. I am 26 years old
(so
> > will probably be the youngest mother in my lab), have finished my
PhD
> > this summer and I am pregnant (3 months). I will try to find a
post
> > doc starting 2-3 months after my baby will be born. I must say
these
> > three last months of pregnancy have been extremely hard
considering
> > my work (I am finishing my papers on my PhD). I could not at all
work
> > 8 hours a day, because I felt very tired, sick all the day and
only
> > could sleep a lot. I don't know at all how it will be when the
baby
> > will be here, but I feel it more secure since I read your opinion
(the
> > message is finally : yes, it is possible to be young scientist and
> > having children, and other parents experience it).
> >
> > Do other mothers have experienced difficulties with their work
during
> > the pregnancy? How did you manage to continue, and how was it
> > perceived by your supervisors and colleagues?
> >
> > Thanks
> >
> > Flore
> >
> >
> >
> > --- In scienceandfamilies@yahoogroups.com, "sescanga" <sescanga@>
> > wrote:
> > >
> > > Hello,
> > >
> > > I'm a Ph.D. candidate and the mother of a 2 year old. I'm
writing up
> > > my dissertation while taking care of my son at home--with help
from a
> > > babysitter 3 mornings a week. It is very inspiring to read the
> > > thoughts people have posted.
> > >
> > > I'm writing an article on the balance of career and family to
be
> > > submitted to Frontiers in Ecology and the Environment at the
end of
> > > the month. My article is based on feedback, obtained through
> > > informal conversations and a score of answers to a formal
survey,
> > > from other ecologists at all stages of career. I finished my
draft
> > > yesterday and was perusing the literature to see what others
had to
> > > say about this topic, and found Carolyn's article (2007,
Bulletin of
> > > ESA), and then joined this group.
> > >
> > > The topics that are of most interest here (and in Carolyn's
article)
> > > are those that are also of most interest to the people who
provided
> > > feedback for my article. It seems as though a lot of these
issues
> > > are pretty universal, and don't have easy answers. In
developing my
> > > article, I was encouraged to see that both men and women shared
a
> > > keen interest in the topic.
> > >
> > > Members of this group might also be interested in the articles
> > > Science has compiled on the topic:
> > >
http://sciencecareers.sciencemag.org/career_development/previous_issue
> > > s/articles/2800/scientists_as_parents_feature_index/
> > >
> > > I'm planning to cite Carolyn's article in my article in the
hopes
> > > that we can perhaps use it as a second jumping off point for
further
> > > fruitful discussions in this group.
> > >
> > > Sara
> > >
> >
>